How to Remain Calm in Turbulent Times

A wise friend once told me the reason we get so “amped” up is because we have a overstimulated nervous system.  I am not surprised especially if you are empathetic by nature.  Of course the food and beverages we intake daily plays a role as well as electronics. Is it possible this is one of the reasons  why are immune system are depleted?  What if we choose to eat healthier such as fruits and vegetables and paid attention to how we felt after we ate.  This would  give us an indicator of what is adding to our life force energy and what depletes it.  I believe we owe it to ourselves.   We choose the highest choices for our children let’s also do this for ourselves.

It all depends on how we look at things, and not how they are in themselves.

Carl Jung

I believe times like this is an invitation to look at what is important and what is good. We can choose calm over “panic,”  or love over fear.   It is important to keep in mind the conversations you are having about the CV and how much attention you give the news.   When I read the headlines fear and panic immediately set in.  I have decided to take a sabbatical from the news.  We are in uncertain times and we as humans  are uncomfortable with this.  It can bring up worry,  loneliness, and isolation.   But what if we took this opportunity to surrender and practice what it feels like “not knowing what the future holds”.  Yes, it can feel lonely and isolated when we are in a place of uncertainty but isn’t life uncertain anyways even though we think we have it all figured out.  None of us have life all figured out and I believe we are not supposed to.  Today is a new day to re-set ourselves as we navigate through this “bumpy” time.

Tips to Calmness:

  1.  Get out in nature and breathe
  2. . Witness your thoughts like clouds moving in the sky rather than getting into your story line
  3. Rest
  4. Spring clean
  5. Involve yourself  in a creative activity, ie. art, dance, cooking etc.
  6. Turn off the TV
  7. Eat healthier
  8. Be around others who are calming.
  9. Be with loved ones
  10. Exercise
  11. Help others when needed

What I am witnessing is how people are coming together from a place of compassion, love and humbleness.

This time right now is a beautiful time to all band together and witness what is unfolding for a better future.  I believe “humanity” has what it takes to get through this uncertain times.

From “Woes to Wow”

At this moment I am recognizing that I need to look at the “Wow Factor” and in translation it means recognizing the simple things that I can so easily overlook.  It is easy to get caught up in our own little pity parties and not focus on “Wow” this happened to me today or  “wow” isn’t this wonderful.  Even though I might not like how something is going I might as well go with the flow with the way life is.  No cents being bent out of shape!

I came home to 2 turkeys in my back yard today.   Unheard and unseen of  and “Wow” that is pretty darn cool.  But at the same time it does not dismiss how you feel inside when feelings arise you just got to feel in order to get to the other side of it.  So when you feel sad, angry don’t dismiss it feel it through to completion and don’t waste any more time than needed and move on to the next thing.   Most of the time what we feel in the moment or in our bodies is a memory of something  that happened a long time ago.  Move your body or do something to shake it off.   Someone once told me a story of a lawyer who quit his job and opened a cake industry.  Brilliant!

 

Wow I get to type these words on my blog and you get to see them, how cool is that?    Wow just the fact that I am breathing is a miracle!  Wow I get to experience life itself just by sitting in this chair and witnessing my thoughts, sounds and texture of this key board.

Yes my friends, the birth of a baby or a beautiful sunset is “WOW”  but what if today you can find the Wow in the mundane and overlooked places.  See or feel what is right in front of  you and I promise you will not be disappointed!

 

A rekindling of friends!

Several weeks ago I was in Croton, NY (upstate)  for a reunion with high school friends.  This trip was planned months ago and I immediately responded “yes” with folks I have not seen in 30+ years!  On my way to the “gathering”  I was filled with excitement and anxiousness.  My mind was infiltrated with “what if’s and questions.  Meeting for the first time in years it felt a little awkward and became very comfortable as memories flooded in  of the past.

There is something to be said about rekindling relationships from long ago and what I refer to as the formative years.  When I say reformative years I am referring to “teenage years.”  As anyone knows “teenage” years can be tumultuous.  For me “I felt like I never fit it.”   Fast forward:  Yes, the “teenager self” still resides within me and she has learned to laugh and not take things as serious.  I’ve learned and continue to learn to be honest, authentic and vulnerable.  I say “thank you” to this teenager’s heart and what she has learned about herself over the years.

It was a wonderful experience of “catching up with one another and getting to know each other again.  It did not take long to bond and find that familiarity with one another.  Someone once said to me we are more alike than different.  I believe that statement to be true.  It is through our humanity that we find love.  We all feel hurt, sadness, and pain and yet it is through this we discover joy, happiness and fulfillment.

A song comes to mind of our time together in Croton, NY.   “Thank you for being a friend. Traveled down a road and back again.  Your heart is true, you’re a pal and a confidant.

I love you and thank you for loving me…         your friend,  Anne

 

 

Life Is a Blessing & Here is Why?

I am the person today because of my past:

Yes, it has been hard, scary, downright terrifying and in between.  but… I would not be the person I am today because of it.

There has been up’s and down’s, left turns and right turns and in between’s but… I am the person today because of it.

There has been stormy, cloudy and bright ski’s  but… I am the person today because of it

There has been earaches, heartaches and tooth aches but… I am the person today because of it.

There has been miracles,  blessings and second guessing but… I am the person today because of it.

There has been night fall and snow fall and fall fall fall but… I am the person today because of it.

There has been children, boredom and conundrum but… I am the person today because of it.

There has been breakthroughs, breakdowns and weepy eyes  but…I am the person today because of it.

There has been pain and sorrow that could not wait for the morrow  but… I am the person today because of it.

I am a speck of the divine and so are you so live it full out and live it for you!

 

 

 

 

 

What do you want? 11 Steps to get there!!!

  1.  Write out you future vision but don’t get lost in the big picture.  Focus on implementing baby steps every day in the direction of your dreams.  Remember you have ideas of how you want to achieve it but ideas can change day to day.
  2.   Let go of comparison.  You are unique and a contributor.  Your history/story is unique to you.  Nobody has it all figured out like we imagine they do.
  3. “Winning” is doing your own thing.
  4. Don’t sit on your decisions, make a decision!  You cannot make a wrong decision
  5. Don’t be afraid to make a mistake.
  6. Look for the opportunities when faced  with “adversity.”  Put your attention on what your gaining rather than what you are losing.
  7. When you feel “direction less”  ~ Talk to someone who will point you in the right direction.
  8. If you cannot make a decision right away don’t pretend it does not exist.  Give yourself permission to come back to it but don’t wait too long.
  9. Communication is important.
  10. Don’t look back of how’s it’s been.  Reframe it of how you want it to be.
  11. Self approval comes from within you!

Yoga and it’s Benefits.

Yoga has been around for 1000’s of years.  Stepping on a Yoga mat can be beneficial for that reason alone.  I became a Yoga Practitioner in 2008 and I knew it was time to do something different in my life.  I was yearning for peace and wanted to know how to become centered.  I want you to know you don’t have to become a teacher to find your center but it was a good thing for me because I needed to show up for myself.  It was a 6 month structure where I had to be consistent, committed and repetitive.

To this day I am inspired by how Yoga benefits myself and others.  A friend of mine went to a class for the first time and discovered how tight his hamstrings were and didn’t know what to do with his “talkative” mind.  After a few classes he realized he was standing up straight as well.  My friends it is the consistent things we do on a daily basis that bring lasting change.

Over the years I have noticed changes in myself from practicing Yoga.  These include~ healthier food choices, lengthening of the spine, stamina, calmness, better digestion, feeling lighter and connected to myself.

I believe that theory about our bodies having a biomemory (stored memories).  I also believe the body can change  by getting on a Yoga mat and getting into positions to lengthen the muscles, spine, calming the central nervous system and many other benefits.   When you do this repetitively your bio memory cannot help but to re-organize itself!

 

Love your Ego….

Love your Ego

Love your mind and let it unwind..

Don’t keep track of your thoughts.  Don’t go back to the incident and try to figure it out or fix it or berate yourself for it.  Leave it in the past and let it have a “blast.”  Thoughts have no power over you ~ Just observe.  99% of the time the thoughts you think will not come to fruition.  You are “loving awareness”,  You are loving awareness.  Your Soul is who you are not your thoughts.  If the mind chatters -just let it!  Let emotions arise.  Embrace your fear, anger and sadness.   Allow, allow and allow.

Don’t believe anything you hear from others or read.  Use your own discretion and intuition.  Stay present and stay in the moment.  Listen to the birds sing and the as  river.  Use you as your own navigation tool.  Don’t take yourself too seriously.  Seriously what are you so serious about anyways.

Trust, play, enjoy, engage, walk away when you need too.  Don’t try too hard.  Life is on your side.  Do what lights you up.  Know that everything will be okay.  It is between you and God anyways.  Let go and don’t try to be spiritual cuz you already are.

 

Empaths vs. Narcissists

I have been carrying this heavy weight on my chest for I don’t know how long.  I am 55 and I have come to the conclusion that I am an empath.  People who are empathetic feel and sometimes carry the weight of the world on their shoulders.  I have also taken responsibility for everyone else’s needs before my own.  I have identified that it is my fault when in fact I’m not seeing what is right in front of me or using my intuition.

Why is it difficult for me to use my intuition?  Because I doubt ~ I always give people the benefit of the doubt and always give them excuses for their behavior.  I also want to feel loved.   I’ve been doing this all of my life and it is time to do things differently.

You may be asking What is a Narcissist?  There is varying degrees of narcissism.  Their is a lot of information about this topic if you were to google search it. I have become curious surrounding this topic due to the fact that I noticed I did not have good boundaries in relationships.  I also noticed I was always people pleasing and wanted to learn about this dynamic.

What I have come to learn about narcissistic behavior:  It’s all about them and what benefits them.  They tend to be a bully.    You lose yourself or your own identity.  Lying and manipulation to get their way.  Don’t take responsibility for their actions and tend to blame others.  Not honoring others and their own space.  Leave a conversation second guessing yourself.  Not honoring of your emotional needs.

Empathetic people tend to see the good in others forgetting to see what is right in front of them.  Empathetic people want peace and can give their power away or think that the other party knows more than they do.  They meet other peoples needs before their own.  Empaths usually do not have good boundaries and try to make things work when they won’t.  Empaths can feel what other’s are feeling and can lose objectivity.

What Empath’s need to do to strengthen themselves:

  1.  Set boundaries.
  2.  Limit your time spent around them or walk away.
  3.  Say “No” when it is safer to say “Yes”.
  4.  Care for your hurt before their hurt.
  5.  Express yourself in a safe environment.
  6.  Get in touch with nature or be with animals
  7.  Listen to music
  8. Honor your sensitivity and well-being
  9.  Love yourself

 

“Self Honesty” requires courage!

Self Honesty is decisive action.  It is ferociousness!  It is putting energy into motion.   It is the best decision I have ever made for myself due to the fact I have been a “people pleaser” my entire life.  It involves being honest with relationships, communication, eating, and doing what is right and necessary for your life.  It is saying “no” when you want to say “yes” for the sake of not creating conflict and saying “Yes” to situations and things that you know serve your well-being.  I have found when I am caught in the scrutiny of making a decision I just don’t make one.  Don’t do things for “acceptance” sake.

Self Honesty builds self-esteem and self-worth.  It requires courage and determination.  At least that is what is on my list of ingredients.  Don’t beat yourself up because you set up “boundaries” in your relationships, especially when it comes to family members.  I believe people will always respect you and if they don’t than it is their problem not yours.  It’s like spring cleaning maybe you need to “spring clean” your friends.  Keep the ones who honor, respect and accept you for who you are.  Doing this for yourself is an act of “kindness” and love.

Be your own best friend, it does not matter what “others” think, it only matters what you believe and think.  What “lights” you up and what makes your heart “sing”.  So go now and show the world what your made of… they have been waiting for you.

How I changed through Vibrational Transformation

What is Transformation Vibration?  A wise person once said (Panache Desai)
“when you change your energy you change your life.”  He refers to himself as a vibrational catalyst.

I have had the privilege to work with him over the course of the past 5 years.  He has helped me transform my “dense” or heavy energy.  This is done through the process of embracing your sadness, fear and anger.  We are taught from an early age on that it is not Okay to feel our feelings.   When we suppress these emotions we literally feel “weighed” down.

When I am in Panaches presence my supppressed feelings rise to the surface and past memories surface and hence my feelings come to life.  such as anger, sadness, pain etc.  I have learned so much about myself over this 5 year period.  This has not been easy by any means….

BENEFITS: 1. Opening my heart (I had no idea I had a closed heart until I met Panache).  2. Being honest with myself. 3.  Overcoming adversity. 4. Less afraid of being judged. 5. Speaking and standing up for myself. 6. Embracing life and much more.

When vibrational transformation happens you get to the covered spaces within you and the love and light do it’s work on your behalf.  It opens up dark corners and the light shines forth. I have noticed that I  have abandoned myself for the sake of putting other people before my own needs.  I had to learn to pull myself in to connect to myself instead of the outside world.  More or less I was giving my power away.  I had to look at “my so called flaws.”

To this day I still don’t like my anger, resentments, jealousy but I am discovering that this is part of our human nature and when we can learn to embrace this instead of “negating” it energy opens up for us in a whole new way.   Love is inclusive ~ the good, bad and ugly.  Remember this next time when you may perceive a not so nice feeling arise!  Don’t settle and don’t sell yourself short.