How a “Boating” accident impacted my family!

I was in an boating accident on the weekend of July 4th, 2017.  In my wildest dreams I never thought this would happen to me, worse yet my entire family (except my son).  My children are in their 20’s.  Intuition is powerful ~ When I stepped on the boat I had a feeling to not go on the boat ride but my stubbornness overrode this feeling.

We came upon a boat that needed towing.   I immediately said “yes” which is not like me.  I sat at the tip of the boat with 2 of Megan’s (my daughter) friends.  We threw a line to the boat and it was probably 3 minutes into the tow when myself and the 2 other gals had a premonition something was about to happen!  …and out of the blue “my husband says they are going to hit us.”  I looked up and saw a boat headed straight towards us.  No time to think or do anything.  They hit the right side of our boat where my husband was driving and ripped out the right side of our boat.  Thankfully we all survived.

We stood there in disarray for a moment and it was completely quite.  The windshield on the right and left side of the boat was shattered in very small pieces and my thought was.  .. oh know someone died! I began to panic as I saw blood on myself and some of the others.  My eyes were open but I did not want to see.   I did a head check and everyone was accounted for.    I saw Megan’s friend crying and she wanted to get out of the boat.  Yep, I felt responsible for everyone!  Always a mother!  I was scared due to the fact I did not know if someone got injured very badly.  Everyone was scared, in shock and crying, even my husband who never shows his feelings.  I was confused because the boat that hit us stayed at bay and did not even offer to help.  Eventually someone did come to help and got the girls who were crying off the boat and towed us into land.  Grateful there was no injures to the boat we were towing but one quick look I could see that they were also in shock.

When I arrived on land I was very grateful and was relieved I was no longer on the boat. From what I saw everyone had that feeling!  I felt powerless due to the fact I saw my daughter crying and some of her friends.  I felt sad that we had this experience.  What I noticed within myself is that I could not form a sentence.  I did this for a few days.  Fear, and anger was my best friend.  It was hard to comprehend what had happened.

Several of us went to the hospital and everything was okay.  What kept going through my mind was how precious life is and it could be gone in an instant!  I also realized none of us were meant to die.

On the way back to my Lake House I was scared that we were going to get in a car accident and my daughter’s felt like that too.  When I arrived back to the house we were humbled, frightened and grateful for this experience.   It’s been 6 months and yesterday I finally (6 months later)  I went to the Lake House and I was glad I did cuz I cried and cried the fears and emotions of what had happened came barreling in.  I had no idea of the amount of fear I carried around with me for 6 months.  that I had that was crippling me until I came face to fa

 

 

What’s The Rush?

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This time of year can be overwhelming ~ family gatherings, parties, work, consumerism, I think you know what I mean.  But does it need to be like this?  I believe we do not need to rush.  For example, New Years Eve is a week away and most people are already focusing on that day.  Food for Thought:  When you find yourself thinking about the future bring yourself back to the moment over and over again.  Here are a few things which have helped me~

1.  Whatever is swimming around in your head put it down on paper.  If you think it, Ink it!

2.  Notice your thoughts and realize they are just thoughts passing through your mind, don’t try to change them or discard them.

3.  Laugh at yourself and others.

4.  Time is an illusion ~ whatever you are doing is what your meant to be doing.  It is not right or wrong.

5.  99% of the time your thoughts do not come to fruition.

6.  Remind yourself that your health and well-being come first and nothing is thatimportant to get bent out of shape about.

7.  Stop, slow down and breathe

8.  Ask yourself “Why am I rushing.”

9.  Let go of the outcome.

None of us has it down pat and by golly I am glad about this.

Why not enjoy the moment no matter what is happening.  There is no right or wrong, it is happening the way that it is so we might as well make it our friend.    I think I rather be floundering than having all my ducks in a row!   The planet will not blow up or your favorite grocery store will not burn down.  FYI:  Walking to the grocery store is just as important as walking to the gym or walking o a party.  Every moment of our lives is important no matter what it is we are doing, even if that means scrubbing the floor.   There is no rush and there is no getting anywhere .  You are already meant to be where you are!

Acceptance is the Key to Forgiveness

When we accept ourselves no matter what grievance we hold against ourselves forgiveness  happens.  Forgiveness includes perceived past wrongdoings or anything we hold ourselves hostage to.  I have found this has been the biggest offering I have given myself.  When I accept blame and shame drops away.  Love enters this space.    Maybe this is the kingdom of heaven.  Stories we tell ourselves are no longer relevant.  Inner peace and harmony is restored and life does not seem difficult.  IMG_2343.JPG

Many words can describe acceptance.  Allowing, being with what is, loving what arises, appreciation and letting go.  It may also include to stop, slow down and breathe.  This will bring you in the present moment and you may be surprised what may arise.  Maybe it is an emotion that you distracted yourself from feeling.  If we all took the time to breathe, relax and allow just imagine what kind of world we would have.

How To Keep The Heart Open!

Why Do We Close our Hearts?

I can only speak from direct experience.  First I would say that we are not brought up with the tools to keep an open heart.  It is not something my parents taught me or I was taught in school.  I’ve heard many times just open your heart ~ Well what the heck does that mean?   At that point I became curious and I began noticing what I noticed.   I noticed I would nIMG_0155-300x200ot feel my emotions ~ for example my anger, sadness or grief, and I felt ill-equipped.  I began to notice there was this heaviness I accumulated in my body and I believe it was because I did not process my own pain.  As time went on I began to get in touch with my anger, sadness, hurt and fear.  As I began to get in touch with these aspects I began to feel lighter and to my amazement less depressed.   Oh here is another big one for me!  I also noticed when I interacted with others I was too involved with their stories.  Over the last 5 years I have been willing to acknowledge my feelings and as I do I unravel.

How to open your heart!

1.  It has taken a lot of courage and trust to do this.   A willingness to open to life and feel.     It takes time and patience and a willingness to meet life from a brand new platform.  It takes baby steps to put something new into motion.  We all have our patterns so be gentle with the self.

2.  If you have heard of that saying it takes a village to bring up a child I believe there is a lot of truth to that.  Find support, people who are honest and who will empower you.  Don’t take No for an answer.   We are more alike than different.  As mother Theresa says “do good anyways.”

3.  I believe authenticity is vital to our well=being.  It is so easy to get caught in societal roles and responsibility. when we are missing the point of just being ourselves.

4.  Find something in your life to be grateful for.  Make a list everyday.  It takes time to change patterns.

5.  Love on your pets!

6.  Do good for someone in need!

7.  Prioritze yourself.  Spend an hour every day to nuture your spirit.

8.  Walk away from people who drag you down.

9.  If it does not feel good do not do it.  The same goes for food choices.

10.  Get out in nature.

11.  Never go to bed angry.

12.  Do more listening than talking.

13.  Listen to your intuition.

14.  Say I am sorry and as Mother Theresa has said, “forgive them anyway!”

Posted on November 1, 2015 by Anne Lamantia